Here we are. The final week of Thumper season. Got here faster than the midnight pony can go from 0-60. Feels like we just saw Kevin get belligerent and completely blow it at Popstroke yesterday.
I don't have much to say this week so I figured we would take a look at transactions each year and how those correspond to the championship.
2025:
Thumper Bowl
Dom - 26 moves
Austin - 27 moves
Toilet Bowl
Logan - 19 moves
Aron - 9 moves (least)
Most Moves = Brady 80 (8th place regular season)
2024:
Thumper Bowl
Austin - 23 moves
Logan - 16 moves
Toilet Bowl
Kevin - 8 moves (least)
Brady - 64 moves (most)
2023:
Thumper Bowl
Brady - 48 moves (most)
Clint - 27 moves
Toilet Bowl
Cord - 24 moves
Rusty - 20 moves
Least Moves = Aron 3 (3rd place)
2022:
Thumper Bowl
Logan - 34 moves
Larry - 27 moves
Toilet Bowl
Austin - 18 moves
Kevin - 13 moves
Least Moves = Chris 11 (8th place)
Most Moves = Brady 79 (4th place)
2021:
Thumper Bowl
Dom - 29 moves
Larry - 29 moves
Toilet Bowl
Aron - 3 moves (Least)
Austin - 32 moves
Most Moves = Brady 89 (10th place)
Total Moves Made Ever (Average per Year)
Brady - 915 (70.4)
Bryan - 587 (45.2)
Austin - 458 (35.2)
Dom - 289 (28.9)
Logan - 346 (26.6)
Rusty - 298 (22.9)
Bruce - 274 (21.1)
Clint - 272 (20.9)
Kevin - 216 (18.0)
Lyndon - 18 (18.0)
Chris - 148 (16.4)
Aron - 92 (8.4)
Do with that info what you will.
The Weatherford Bowl this year will determine the last place team in the league. Logan is a one time Toilet Bowl champion while Aron has never won it.
Logan was able to make a late season run to get out of 11th place. Unfortunately it didn't matter as he was upset by Lyndon last week. On the other side, Aron had the bye wrapped up with like 3 weeks left in the season.
As of Christmas Eve, Aron is projected to win by 2.5 points. Logan has Jordan Love starting who is questionable, so those projections could change quick with a lineup change.
It's difficult to split these two up. Both finished 5-9. Both finished within 21 points of eachother on the season. Plus, these two split their previous meetings, with each getting a win by 25+ points.
I don't even know who to pick here. Logan has Achange and Henry, but Aron has Jeanty and Hampton. Then they both have a bunch of meh players.
I'm going to take Logan and predict that Aron doesn't put Jeanty in his lineup, gifting himself his first Golden Toilet Championship.
Commissioner's Pick: Logan
The Cousin Bowl. The Watonga Bowl. The Thumper Bowl. It doesn't matter what you call it, this looks like an exciting matchup. ESPN has it projected at 124 - 131for Dom. That's a high scoring projection for ESPN.
Austin won both matchups throughout the season. In week 4 he squeeked out a 3 points victory in an extremely high scoring matchup that ended 165-162. In week 13 Austin won by 35 points during Dom's 6 game losing streak.
Both teams have very strong RB cores. Bijan and Javonte have carried Austin in the second half of the year. Jacobs has one of the top RBs all year, while Gainwell has been one of the best RBs in the entire league over the last 6 weeks.
Austin has the best TE in football, while Dom has been streaming most of the year. Luckily for Dom, he has the best WR core I think we've ever seen this late in the season. JSN and Puka have been WR 1 and 2 for almost the entire year, while Michael Wilson has been a top 5 WR the last 6 weeks of the season. How do you compete with that?
You don't. Looking at Austin's team, I don't know how he made it this far or how he can compete with Dom's team this week. I swear to god if he wins back-to-back Thumper Bowls I will burn this place to the ground.
Commissioner's Pick: Austin only because of the Commissioner's Curse
